You will do things you regret in the name of love. Twenty-eight kilometres into a marathon, I realised I didn’t like running

• Get our weekend culture and lifestyle email

As anyone who’s downloaded a dating app knows, looking for love online is an absolute cesspool; men holding babies that aren’t theirs, still figuring out their dating goals (you’re 37 years old, Ryan!) and insisting on letting you know they’re six foot … if it matters.

Meanwhile, if you’re a gay man people are now meeting on an app called Sniffies, which is like Grindr but without faces.

Sign up for the fun stuff with our rundown of must-reads, pop culture and tips for the weekend, every Saturday morning